Feb 062015
 

Check-in at the South African counter was a breeze, and based on the seatmaps on ExpertFlyer we looked to have a pretty empty load going down to Johannesburg today. Up to immigration where I made some nice chat with the agent, she asked if I went to the lake, and then looking at my passport picture quizzically, I said “yep, it’s still me!” Her sassy response? “Yes, and you are wearing same shirt as two days ago.” I was NOT about to let that stand…same type of shirt, yes, but slightly different colour. The agent sitting next to her looked over and told her “you need to examine your eyes! This is orange that is red!” Hahahah…

Off to the lounge…which was closed. Instead, the airport cafe had been converted to the business class lounge. Hmmmm….and the air conditioning was broken. So was the internet. Fortunately, it was cool and I only had a bit over 30 minutes to wait for my flight. The lounge was pretty spartan, but had one of the most delicious flavours of chips I’ve ever tried…good thing I can’t find these in America!

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Caught up on e-mails for a bit and enjoyed the chips (but resisted a second bag) and enjoyed the view of the tarmac:

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Soon, it was time to head down to the gate and board. There was security before the gate, and then there was another bag check where you had to open up your bags and have them hand-searched. By hand-searched I mean open them up, have a hand stuck in them for 2 seconds, and let you go. Security theatre at its finest.

Boarding was via a bus gate, which of course meant the pushiest got to board first with no concern for priority. Flight looked pretty empty today, so it really didn’t matter.

From my seat, looking back to the airport:

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Door closed…and OMG, I’m the only person in business class. 32 seats, and it’s only me. Not having to worry about other passengers totally changes the calculus of where you want to sit.

South African Airways flight 171
Lilongwe, Malawi (LLW) to Johannesburg, South Africa (JNB)
Depart 13:05, Arrive 15:35, Flight Time 2:30
Boeing 737-800, Registration ZS-SJV, Manufactured 2003, Seat – EVERYTHING! (but sat in 04A)

Earlier, the purser had asked me if I had fun in Malawi. I said “yes, but I didn’t get to see Madonna, so I’m disappointed.” When the door closed and it was confirmed I was all alone, he comes over and says “now you can pretend you ARE Madonna and this is your private jet.” Hahahah! I asked him to take pics to document, and he went nuts, taking 20+ pictures.

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Lunch was underwhelming, but at least the beef was a nice medium and edible. The purser told me there was “plenty more if I want more of anything”:

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That clearly includes garlic bread! 😉 Look at all that garlic bread! A full business class of catering all to myself!

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Landed right on time, immigration was a piece of cake, and headed off to the Gautrain to head into Sandton. I was struggling a bit, so stopped for a triple iced espresso in the airport, and then headed on my way. Quick ride to Sandton station, and then time to find my hotel…the Hilton. For some reason I seem to stay in different hotels every time I go to Jozi, and this trip was no different. I don’t know why I’ve never settled on one hotel, but it is what it is. This time, the Hilton had a pretty good rate which combined with Hilton Diamond status made me go for it.

Walk was a bit longer from the station than I expected at 900m, and that combined with the sun and hills made it a bit of a trek with bags. No worries, checked in, and was given a nice studio suite. One thing about Hilton I’m not overly pleased with is their push to sell “guaranteed” upgrades…which aren’t really guaranteed. You agree to pay for an upgrade if it’s available at check-in, in an attempt to give them to people willing to pay over people with status. It’s annoying, but it is what it is. Anyways, the room was nice, blah blah.

Made some phone calls, including to United, to change my flight out to Madagascar the next day. Recovering from a sinus infection a couple of weeks prior, combined with jetlag, and I was just feeling exhausted…and not ready to spend nights in a forest lodge without modcons. So, I decided to stay in Jozi an extra night. Tickets were easily changed with a few Skype calls, and then I set off to get a hotel.

Unfortunately, the Hilton was sold out, so I wouldn’t be able to stay another night. Everything else I usually stayed at was full as well, or extremely expensive. I decided to go back to the first hotel I every stayed at in South Africa over 15 years prior, the Hyatt. I first stayed at this hotel back in 1998 when I went to Johannesburg with friends to see U2 when they first played South Africa. The hotel had great memories, but I hadn’t stayed there since. Managed to book an executive floor king room with some orphaned Hyatt points, and was all set. Now, to enjoy Johannesburg a tiny bit!

It was already quite late, so I headed up to the executive lounge for snacks and wine. The lounge attendant was attentive…probably a bit too attentive. Every time I turned my back my wine glass was full, and within an hour I think I put down three rather large glasses. So much for my motivation to head out to dinner! Managed to drag myself out the door, walk back to Nelson Mandela Square, and find dinner regardless. Quick dinner of Thai (the only place with outside seating immediately available) and headed back to the hotel and absolutely passed out.

Slept in a bit the next morning, and headed up to the lounge for a light breakfast. After that I grabbed an Uber down to Melville to check out another neighbourhood I hadn’t seen in nearly 20 years, and walked around for a bit, grabbed a coffee, and just relaxed. Got back to the hotel after a while, and then grabbed my bags and took the Gautrain to Rosebank to check into the Hyatt.

Got there, up to the Exec Lounge to check-in (which was just as I remembered) and then met up with another blog reader for lunch. He picked me up, and we went to Wolf Pack in Parkhurst for burgers and craft beer. Clearly he reads my blog and knows that craft beer and burgers are a quick ticket to getting me talking! One of the nicest things about this blog has been how readers have generously invited me out to show me their city or for meals and give me a bit of an insider’s look into the city.

Relaxed a bit after lunch, headed back to Nelson Mandela Square for coffee and to people watch a bit, before heading back to the Hyatt to grab a couple of glasses of wine during Happy Hour. This lounge shot is from breakfast the next morning:

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After a couple of glasses of wine, met a friend for dinner at Doppio Zero in The Firs for dinner. It had been years since I spent any real time at the Hyatt, and I had no idea this little courtyard area was located basically just behind the hotel. We had a great dinner and chat, kept it going with after-dinner drinks and catching up, and stayed up a bit later than planned…but it was so worth it. One of the greatest things about travel are the things you can’t plan like tours and such but just happen. Even with staying up a little bit late I managed to meet my goal of resting up a bit and was ready to head off to Madagascar in the morning!

Feb 032015
 

After a rather long day at work  it was off to Dulles Airport to begin the long trek to Malawi. Uneventful ride on the metro (the new silver line seriously makes the trek out to Dulles so much less painful since I live across the street from the station) and soon I was upstairs to check-in. Dulles was a ghost town for some reason, and check-in and TSA took no time at all, and soon I was “enjoying” the United Global First Lounge. Bubbles? Don’t mind if I do!

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Had about an hour in the lounge where I caught up on work e-mails since I’d been out of the office all day, had a few glasses of bubbles and some shrimp cocktail, and right on time it was time to board the flight to London.

United flight 924
Washington DC, Dulles (IAD) to London, Heathrow (LHR)
Depart 22:00, Arrive 10:15, Flight Time 7:15
Boeing 777, Registration N778UA, Manufactured 1996, Seat 2K

I was sort of excited for this flight, since I used to be a regular on it. For about three years I was on this flight roughly twice a month commuting back and forth to London, almost always on Thursday nights. I hadn’t been on it in three years, so was looking forward to seeing if some of the London-based crews I’d gotten to know well were still working it. Unfortunately, no, it’s crewed by DC-based crews now but still promised to be a nice flight.

Until….I found out my seat had two broken storage compartments. The purser verified there were only three passengers tonight, so told me to move from 1K back to 2K. No problem at all…until four nonrevs showed up. It started with “that’s my assigned seat.” So, I told her my seat was broken, and the purser had authorized me to move so they should take it up with her. “No, you must take your assigned seat!”

So, I paged the purser….who told them to sort it out and take whatever seats were left – they were not to disturb revenue passengers. It was two groups of two, two of whom were on buddy passes. The nasty lady who was ordering me to move then tried to pin it on the other two. Ugh. Eventually the purser paged the gate agent to scold them….the gate agent came back, and told the buddy pass riders they’d have to get off the plane for violating rules…so, I had to step in. Ugh. Majorly uncomfortable. I literally couldn’t believe how aggressively this woman was fighting to sit next to her companion. Finally, I looked right at her and said “you should be thankful you’re even in first, I can’t believe you’re arguing this.” Her response? “Our benefits are negotiated and I know I’m entitled to my assigned seat!” Sigh. Eventually, they were told to sit down, shut up for the duration of the flight, or be offloaded…and we pushed back.

Welcome aboard class of Jeff Cliquot in the always-classy plastic flute. Number one of two the awesome purser brought me to tolerate the nonsense going on around me.

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Pushback….bins still open…and STAYED open during takeoff.  That’s the offender in the blue shirt 😉

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